the two opposing (and complementary) factors for change


Sometimes I don't allow myself to be an agent of change because I am afraid to make and face hard decisions.

I resist change because I am afraid of facing the repercussions, even if I know it will ultimately benefit me.

I am not sure how to navigate the fallout so I procrastinate.

However, you don't have to worry about the fallout in too much detail before you start implementing change.

Because the outcome will always differ in significant ways from your initial expectations.

Decide to let go of your need to know what comes next.

Because you can't know.

Whatever happens as a result of change is just what happens.

Making change is a balancing act between understanding that we each have the power to make choices that affect our lives and also understanding that there is a limit to that power.

To make change, you have to realize yourself as an agent of change in every moment, you must surrender yourself to the uncertainty of the process and muster up the courage to face the fallout.

You can't get started making a change in the first place unless you grant yourself the permission to be the owner of your life.

But you also can't finish what you started unless you acknowledge that the consequences of your actions might negatively impact you and you'll still be okay.

If you've ever felt like it takes you too long to make a significant life change that you desperately want to make, it's not because there's anything wrong with you.

It's because coming to terms with being the person who knowingly makes a choice that might detrimentally affect your own life is a hard process.

Of course the process takes a long time!

This is why some people prefer the rip-off-the-bandaid method of change. They'll still get burned, but at least they'll get burned quickly...

Perhaps you rip the bandaid off, or perhaps you dwell obsessively on the possible outcome of every scenario until you finally get sick of hearing your incessant brain-worrying to the point that you are propelled into action.

Either way, know that there's no "right" way to make change in your life, and there's no right timing to either.

There is no award for making the fastest life change.

There is also no award for assessing every angle before acting.

Allow yourself to be aware of your desire for change, and allow yourself to take action in whatever way suits you.

Take as much time or as little as you need.

Give yourself the permission and the benefit of the doubt that you will make the right choice for yourself and that no matter how it turns out, you will still be just fine.


Iris Rankin

Soulful questioner, exuberant organizer, here to find the balance between discipline and delicious relaxation. Iris Rankin is the founder of Project Intention, a values-based community focused on living day-to-day with purpose, planning, and heart. Iris encourages women to adopt the self care practices that make them feel divine, the planning tools to hone in on their essential wants and needs, and the emotional resilience to express their most authentic selves.

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